Tomorrow will mark six months that Brian has been gone, six months that have flown by. Life is precious and fleeting. There have been so many ups and downs over the last half-year. Wow… half of a year that he’s been gone from this earth. Healing from loss hurts. A lot. However, the deep sadness has made the happy moments twinkle more, I think. There are some days I have trouble opening my eyes and finding a reason to get out of bed. Sometimes I have trouble smiling and laughing. Then there are the moments the heaviness lifts a little and the joy rises up. Thankfully those happen more often than not. I hope I am learning, day by day, to appreciate the lightness in life.
I fill the silence at night, when I’m trying to find sleep, with music and this song comes on a lot. It’s about love, any real love you feel. It was born out of a time when the artist, Jason Mraz, wanted to give up on himself and life. Real love is unconditional and I don’t think it gives up, even when it may want to or feels like it needs to. It hangs on a little longer, often changing but never wavering, waiting for the darkness to pass. We need to have that kind of love for others, of course, but also for ourselves.
For anyone feeling some loneliness, sadness, or loss of any kind, I hope you have a listening ear nearby, an arm gently draped around you, and warm words filling your soul. And joy. Always joy.
Music = Joy